Never thought I will still be standing...

Although I am still standing.... But I can't stress enough of how much my life was bad in the last couple of years... And the problem is that the more I go deep into the rabbit hole..and wonder land.... . The more I think about submitting a refuge demand to Mars maybe I can find happiness there.. If they accepted my refuge application .. First time I understand why Ellon Musk is insisting this much on going to Mars...